Locked Out Hopping onto the bathroom vanity made of fake marble, that my mother called elegant, I studied my face. The answer to my question had to be hiding somewhere in my features. Why wouldn't other kids play with me? With desperation, I searched my reflection for what made me unacceptable. Two slightly slanted green [...]
Hits and Misses of my Past and Present Doctors/Treaters I have been on a journey through mental health wellness for the past 24 years. This is my experience from my first treatment provider to my current providers. It shows how lucky I have been as I have had many “hits” and only 2 “misses.” My [...]
The first time I can ever remember my OCD showing itself was fourth grade. My sister, only three years older, was showing me a rated R movie, and my mother walked in. As any typical mother would, she scolded us. Something switched in me that day. I don’t really know what it is that just [...]
“I can’t do this anymore. I can’t help you.” “You just want me to admit that I am broken! You are looking for a reason to leave” “No. I am looking for a reason to stay.” Not everyone can can look at the exact moment when their lives changed. I am lucky. My partner Gray [...]
“My arm is a spider web, my brain is a raging fire and anyone who wants to tell me I’m fine doesn’t know what’s going on in my mind.” That is what I wrote on November 13th, not knowing that just 4 days later my friends and colleagues would be taking me to the ER [...]
I Say, I'm Recovered. However is there such a thing. I don't abuse laxitaves, or make myself purge. No longer restricting calories, or missing social events. However is there such a thing as being fully recovered. I do look in the mirror and say wow I'm fat Yes, I avoided the gym and eating healthy [...]
I would like to start off by saying I am one of the many people to be hindered in life by depression. Many people who don’t necessarily struggle with depression think of it as only being overly sad; I’m here to tell you that is far from the truth. Depression can come in many forms [...]
-HONEY- I couldn’t comprehend how Spring would bring new life when my heart was still buried in last September, decaying under the memories of you. But, Spring has come and gone and Autumn reigns again, bursting forth colorful displays that remind us all that there is beauty in the breakdown and life in letting go. [...]
Right now I feel like I’m standing on fairly level ground looking back over the past several months of spiraling anxiety and depression like a rocky, brambly, dark, deep canyon I just traversed. Things are slowing down now and seem a bit brighter. All the sleepless nights and nightmares, the headaches and stomachaches, the loss [...]
I don't even know where to start with one of these, Ive never done this before, but its gotten so bad that I hope writing about this will help. For as long as I can remember I've always been a "shy" child. Where this stems from I have no idea, nothing tragic ever happened to [...]
