When you're down I will be there. Yeah, I mean me - depression. Sorry, I didn't introduce myself. But I mean, you know me well enough already right. I'm not trying to be rude, but there are so many different kinds of "me." Which form of depression do you have in your brain? Oh sorry, which [...]
I am 24 years old, and I was diagnosed with Bipolar II when I was 19 after years of struggling with mental health. A little over a year ago was the first time I learned about ECT (electroconvulsive therapy). ECT is a kind of treatment that you only consider as a last resort. I had [...]
Sometimes there's no answer in sight. I can see the road ahead and there are three forks, but which way do I go? I've never been particularly good with decisions and this is no different. I want to figure out the "answer" and I keep going over the song lyrics and hoping they will provide [...]
What Being Diagnosed With Bipolar Disorder Taught Me About Myself I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in early 2016 and it terrified me. It was the least unexpected diagnosis I’ve ever received, but that didn’t make it any easier. Bipolar II Disorder, the words hung over me like a label I would never be able [...]
If I could I would tell him exactly how I feel, but I don't. If I could I would feel comfortable with the number 13, but I'm not. If I see it I need to make it 14. If I could I would step on a crack. But I don't because I'm afraid of what [...]
I still remember the day my aunt talked about the suicide of her neighbor: “She was only 15 years old! I don’t know what she was thinking. What could be going on for a 15 year old?” To me, that was the problem. Not that people did not understand suicide, but people did not try [...]
Many years ago I intended to tell my story for the It Gets Better campaign. In those days, I was a successful business executive despite having never finished high school, having been homeless and struggling at 16 years old. Through a series of fortunate and unfortunate events, I managed to survive, not unscathed, but I [...]
I have trouble saying what I mean. I am a blunt person, but saying what I mean is hard when I feel like the person on the other end is going to judge me. I'm beginning to learn that even if they DO judge me, it is not a reflection of me or my feelings. [...]
“The greatest expression of rebellion is joy.” -Joss Whedon Getting out of bed this morning is a struggle. Everything feels tender and sore, both physically and emotionally, and part of me tries again to convince the other part of me that it would be so much better to stay under the covers all day. I’ve [...]
When I am around other people I smile and pretend to be happy. I don't enjoy doing that, but I need to sometimes. It's a relief from depression. Sometimes I am physically and emotionally spent and the way I cope with that is to smile. Is that weird? It's kind of like in acting when [...]
