In 1997 I was 17 years old and I wanted to die; mindfulness meditation saved my life. If it wasn’t for Jon Kabat-Zinn’s body scan and sitting meditations, I would be dead. I was able to focus all my anxious and depressed energy into one singular place. My brain literally would not shut the fuck [...]
When my wife, Ann, was officially diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, it was not the major revelation that one might expect. It was a label to the problem I had been dealing with since she left Silver Hill Hospital. I knew something was amiss. Despite the weekly double session therapy she’d been attending faithfully and her [...]
I was always diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (along with a diagnosis with PSTD). I was okay with that. It took some time, but I was okay with my diagnosis. I wasn't always. I went through stages. At first I was made at the defect that I was born with. Then I was sad, because I [...]
More than anything, I want to help other people around me. Ever since I was young, I’ve always helped others before helping myself. I was under the impression from a young age that if you gave yourself self-love or self-care that you were selfish. This is unfortunately the conditioning that we receive at a very [...]
MORE THAN THE MADNESS My name is John Kaniecki and I suffer from bipolar disorder. Please allow me to present my credentials. I have been hospitalized nine times three of them being committed. I have spent over a year locked away. I even spent a night in jail. When I first started taking the medicine [...]
Hello again, This is a companion to a piece that I penned on October 27, 2016. I would like to thank The Mighty for publishing my original post. The editors give a much-needed voice to the voiceless. The publishers at The Mighty have given a lost soul like myself a forum to tell my own [...]
Wrestling for Control of My Mental Health Mental illness is a unique issue in that everybody has an opinion about what it is, how to treat it, the use/efficacy of medication, etc. Often, the person suffering doesn’t have a voice. In the past, I worked as a caretaker and nursing assistant for patients with physical [...]
It’s Me, Isn’t It? My dream was to get a PhD. in Philosophy from either Vanderbilt or Princeton. I’d been accepted to both of their graduate / postgraduate programs. It was Spring. I had spent all my years since college saving and planning for this. My problems started out with a (relatively) simple emotional issue: [...]
Bipolar has destroyed me. I suffer from a mental illness known as Bipolar disorder. Most people know it as the "happy and sad disorder". Most people know it as one stage you are elated, and the other, you are depressed. Yes, you are right about the "sad" being depression. But the "happy" spectrum, you aren't [...]
It Shines By: Beth Moore I’m quick to reflect on high school glory days. It’s pretty silly, seeing as how I’ve not even reached the 10-year reunion mark. Flipping through my old yearbook, I noticed one of my favorite teachers wrote “Dear Beth, calling you a delicate flower would not give justice to your violently [...]
