“How did I get here?” It’s a question I used to obsess over, feeling distraught over what I felt were the world’s standards for my age versus what I had actually accomplished at that point in time. I grieved how much I felt was stolen from me because of my mental illness and wondered if [...]
Getting Through an Episode The curtain opens. I am Jonathan. I have schizophrenia. I don’t want to make a big introduction. Perhaps some of you have read my work before. For me, schizophrenia is similar to what I have read. In the early material, from such turn-of-the-century psychiatrists as Kraepelin and Bleuler, there seems to [...]
8 Ways To Help A Loved One With Depression 1- Allow Your Presence To Be Present Show up and just be there - Not to make the situation better. But, to show your loved one that he or she is not alone. Your presence and you being present with them is powerful. Sitting in the [...]
“I Wanted To Kill Myself” My brain injury changed me and took away my hope, my smile, my laughter, and the life I knew The heaviness of that burden made me want to GO The life I knew had changed so much that a darkness came over me that I could not shake All I [...]
Wounded healers: from clinical psychology to fiction There’s a vivid and visceral description of self-harm in the opening chapter of my novel, Sugar and Snails. When I read it to people who know I’m a former clinical psychologist, I’m often asked if this scene stems from my work. While it’s true that past patients and [...]
Whispers Brains on the bathroom floor Gloating Consciousness above me Floating Despair at life unlived Responsibility relieved Bucket made of bone A sieve Whispers of all doubt Believed. Copyright © 2009, 2014, 2015 Bill Friday * * * Bill Friday is a very much living Fictionary, 8 Megapixel Artist, and Bloody Awful Poet, [...]
I took a bottle of pills when I was fifteen. It wasn’t the right kind, or maybe it was, depending on the desired result. But I was trying to die and I didn’t, so I guess it was the wrong or right kind of pills. I took them to drown out the guilt, the anger. [...]
“The person who completes suicide, dies once. Those left behind die a thousand deaths, trying to relive those terrible moments and understand … Why?” – Clark (2001) I cry every time I speak in public about Jerry’s suicide. Jerry was my little brother. He was 35 and left behind his wife and two little boys. [...]
Once upon a time, there was a woman who recognized a need for a centralized place where people affected by mental illnesses could come together and tell their stories. That woman's name is Sarah Fader, and her international non-profit organization is called Stigma Fighters. A grand community was built from such an idea that encouraged [...]
I have Trichotillomania. Trichotillomania (Trich for short; also known as TTM or hair pulling disorder) is an impulse control disorder characterized by the compulsive urge to pull out one's hair. I've had Trich ever since I was either 16 or just turned 17, my junior year of high school. I'm not sure why or when [...]
