You will not find my picture in the dictionary next to ADHD. But, I have it. I am not a hyperactive eight-year old boy. I am a 40-year old woman. My diagnosis came at the age of 39, after a lifetime of anxiety, crushing self-expectation, even more crushing self-disappointment, and a healthy serving of feeling [...]
Borderline Personality Disorder – my experience This article was written by me in April 2011. So much has happened since then, and I have recovered from BPD and OCD (coping with anxiety and depression),but I do not stop fighting to beat the stigma surrounding mental health issues and am currently studying to be a counsellor [...]
Pressing the Button It was one of the hardest things I’ve done. Clicking the button that would say: “I’m one of you. Those thoughts you have, about the world, about yourself, those depressing, self-deprecating thoughts – I have them, too.” Did I really want to expose my private thoughts? Did I really want to link [...]
I am not a snowflake. Of late, this has been my mantra. Mainly it’s because I have been struggling to write a decent query for my novel, and every time I feel sorry for myself I remember that this is not my struggle alone, but that of every writer dreaming of publishing. However, when I [...]
I wrote an article for Psychology Today entitled I'm Taking Crazy Back. I have been called crazy too many times to count, and by the 100th time it gets old. Crazy is a derogatory word. It is discriminatory. I wrote this piece to clarify how offensive this word is. You can read that article here [...]
Depression has always run in my family. Before they talked about it, most people would just call it alcoholism or addiction. Depression is the cause and alcohol & drugs were just attempts to self medicate. The need to feel good out-ranked the after effects. My dad always had an addictive personality, whether it was Pepsi or [...]
My career ended with a phone call on Monday, 25 October 2010. “Mark. Dam Neck demands you have no contact with anyone at work.” With those words, I had a choice to make. Leave work on Medical Leave for mental health problems, or be fired. I chose medical leave. The end of my career started [...]
Always Anxiety For as long as I can remember, I’ve been on edge. I always have that slight fear in the pit of my stomach. I jump when the doorbell or the phone rings. Driving on a highway makes my palms sweat. I have to medicate myself to get on a plane. Though, it seems [...]
I can remember my first anxiety attack as if it was yesterday. I was 11 years old and I was getting trouble a lot in school. I was a very smart kid. I knew all the answers, I just lacked the motivation to succeed. As a result my grades suffered. I remember studying for a test, and I [...]
As far back as I can remember, my life has always been one big bucket of shit. About the age of four or five is when I begin remembering abuse. In my home yelling, beatings, degradation and humiliation were the norm. I hate holidays now, because then, every holiday was a fucking mess because of [...]