Years of self-deprecation and chronic embitterment gave me pause, and I withheld my Stigma Fighters submission for a week, maybe two, before I finally sent it. Who are you to be glorious, loved, appreciated? You’re not important. You’re damaged goods. Then my ego, viciously overcompensating for my id, chimed in, Besides, who would gain anything [...]
I'll be honest about it: This is the most difficult thing I've ever had to write. Not because I'm afraid of what others will think of me or my illness, but rather what I think about it. But each time, I've had an episode of depression or mania, I refused to give in. One thing [...]
My life, since I was eight years old, has been a roller coaster of emotions. I was bullied badly in school, up until I got into the 11th grade, and then I simply changed my persona to be 'a bad ass', but in reality, I was so anxious of people's reactions. I was molested by [...]
I'm part of the largest ethnic minority group in the United States. By 2050, Latinos will account for 25% of the U.S. population. These rising numbers keep most politicians scratching their heads on how to handle immigration issues wishing there was an easy way out for them of course. In my opinion, they only help [...]
I’ve always struggled with my identity; who I am and what I stand for. The ebb and flow of anxiety and depression have only exacerbated those feelings with ruminating cycles of self-doubt and delusion. When I was finally diagnosed several years ago I felt as though a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I [...]
Why I fear the good days I can look back on a rather full and varied life. I have had many good times, I have also had many rather unpleasant times. This is typical of pretty much every person on the planet. Physically I am better off than many, I have arrived at my forties [...]
This isn't the story I want to tell, this isn't the story I want to be living. Write about my life they say. Like it's easy to rip open the doors of my mind and explain to every person who will read this how fucking hard it is to wake up. My very good friend [...]
The Ghost of Christmas Past It was a Thursday afternoon, December 17, 1964, when Mom died of a ruptured brain aneurysm. She was only 34. I was 14 and my little brother Jerry’s 7th birthday was the day we saw our Mom laying in her casket at the funeral home. She was wearing a pretty [...]
NUMBING MEMORIES Dear friend, Sorry I haven’t written to you in last 21 days… Perhaps I was too busy, too distracted or too happy to be sad… But it’s all superficial, isn’t it? You finally have a happy streak and deep down you are afraid that you will get bad again and eventually it does [...]
If living with a misdiagnosed mental illness for seven years and running through the gauntlet of prescription medications to treat anxiety and depression isn’t enough, having an arrest serve as the catalyst that ultimately leads someone to a correct diagnosis and corresponding effective treatment program has been surreal to say the least. Add the words [...]
